Redo Love, Flora OngBook a call

1:1 Attachment coaching with Flora Ong

Same guy.
Different face.

You can name your attachment style. You've read Attached, paid for the therapy, journaled until 2am. And you still grab onto the slightest crumb of attention and fall apart when it's taken away.

The Redo Love Method™ works on the subconscious, where that pattern got coded. In 12 weeks you learn to trust yourself again and stay present when someone actually shows up.

Book a free call See how it works
Flora Ong speaking on stage about the Redo Love Method

This is for you if

You know the pattern.
You keep repeating it.

You've been the one doing all the work to hold the relationship together. Again.

He goes quiet for a day and you're rage texting, rereading old messages, or praying he'll finally see what's right in front of him.

You've crushed it at work, with money, with friends. Relationships are the one place you keep hitting a brick wall.

You know you should leave, or stay, or set the boundary. You just can't get yourself to do it.

You spent years and thousands of dollars in therapy. You understand everything now, and nothing has changed.

You can see it now.
You're the common denominator.

"I keep doing the same thing over and over." "I know I'm the problem, but I don't know how to fix it." If you've said those words to a friend, or only to yourself at night, you're in the right place.

Seeing the pattern hasn't stopped you from living it. Meanwhile the years keep passing. You watch other people build real partnerships while you try to work out why your nervous system hijacks you every time someone shows interest. And somewhere under all of it sits a quiet fear: I don't want to die alone.

Flora Ong smiling, leaning against a wall

Imagine this instead

You take your
power back.

Picture a Tuesday night. He hasn't replied in a few hours and your stomach doesn't drop. You go to the gym, you see a friend, you sleep. You trust yourself to make solid decisions and choose the life you want.

  • Trust your gut when something feels wrong, and act on it
  • Stop the anxiety spiral when he doesn't text back
  • Speak your truth and ask for what you need without feeling needy
  • Stop attracting the wrong ones and notice the red flags early
  • Feel calm. Maybe the calmest you've been in your life
  • Find someone who loves and accepts you, and let yourself be loved

My clients have gotten married, moved in with partners, and finally felt secure. One went from twelve years of a toxic dynamic to a healthy partnership in 12 weeks.

My story

Flora Ong in a camel blazer, arms folded, smiling down

I was 37, divorced,
and falling apart over crumbs.

After 14 years of marriage and two kids, I was happy to divorce. What I didn't realize was how conditioned I'd become to our toxic dynamic. I had no idea who I was outside of being married. Emotionally, I was operating at 16.

Then I found the dating apps. It was fun for about five minutes. Very soon I noticed how quickly I'd attach to the slightest bit of attention from a guy, and how I'd fall apart when it was withdrawn. The longing, the neediness, the desperation. It was suffocating.

After the fifth guy, same pattern, different face, I finally saw it. This isn't about them. This is about me. The feeling was identical every single time. I couldn't keep blaming the men.

Knowing my attachment style
changed absolutely nothing.

I read Attached and it was like clouds parting in my mind. I could name my attachment style. I still attached. I still got hurt. I still longed. Knowledge alone just made me aware of my prison while I was still locked inside it.

So I tried everything. Therapy, self-help books, journaling, affirmations, dating coaches. One coach told me the guy I was desperate over wasn't the one. I was furious. She was right. I even wrote a whole dating book trying to figure out what was wrong with me, and never published it.

None of it stuck because I was trying to fix a subconscious problem with conscious tools. You can't think your way out of something that happened in the unconscious mind.

When I found subconscious reprogramming, everything changed. My abandonment fears and my need for validation had been coded long before the divorce, probably in childhood. Once I worked there, I developed a genuinely secure attachment. I built my business, bought my first home, and gave myself the stability I'd been looking for in men.

I'm not a coach speaking theory. I've been exactly where you are. That's Redo Love.

Black and white portrait of Flora Ong laughing

The Redo Love Method™

Release. Reprogram. Recreate.
Integrate. Embody.

Most coaches teach attachment theory. I reprogram the subconscious. Your subconscious doesn't seek what's good for you. It seeks what's familiar. That's why you keep feeling drawn to the same type of person, even when you know better.

01

Release

You get brutally clear on what's actually running the show. No blame. You see the subconscious block that's been coding your behavior since childhood and where it came from.

02

Reprogram

This is where the change happens. We reprogram the belief that made you push love away, or hold on too tight. We change your history so your future becomes different.

03

Recreate

From this new foundation you rebuild what secure attachment looks and feels like. Practically. You learn to stay present without losing yourself.

04

Integrate

You start making decisions from this new place. You spot red flags because you're not desperate. Your intuition becomes reliable again.

05

Embody

You become the person who can have secure love. You show up differently, and people respond to you differently.

Why this works when therapy didn't

The change happens
where the wound got stuck.

Your subconscious doesn't know the difference between what's real and what's imagined. Psychologists call this memory reconsolidation. Professional athletes use the same principle when they visualize a race before they run it.

In our sessions we use guided visualization to revisit the moments that taught you love was conditional. You get to feel what it's like to be cared for the way you needed. Then you bring that feeling into your relationships today.

One client told me she'd spent two and a half years in weekly therapy. Within our program she was going to the gym three times a week, providing her own security for the first time in her life.

Flora Ong at her desk with Redo Love books

In their words

"And getting married in July.
Still blows my mind."

Karly, from a client's email

Email from Karly
Karly · now engaged, then married
Email from Dave K.
Dave K. · "Jen and I did get married in June"
Email from Autumn
Autumn · after a cold discard

"This whole thing has been like the best investment I've ever made in my life. I've not been this calm in my life."

Marcel

"It helped me stop over-explaining, over-giving, and chasing emotionally unavailable men. I feel grounded, confident, and clear on what I want, and what I will never settle for again."

Geraldine C

"Shane gave me a 30 day eviction notice and then took off to Vegas. I gave myself 2 days in bed and then got to work. I found a house and am very excited to provide my own security for the first time in my life."

Autumn

"I asked my guy if he could just come over and be some comfort to me, and he did. I would have avoided asking for that in the past."

Jamie

"Before working with you I was in therapy for a while and knew what I needed to do but hit a wall. Working with you gave me the tools to actually move forward."

Todd H

"I no longer feel the urge to chase validation or prove my worth to anyone. I know my value, and I trust myself to make the right choices."

Client feedback

Work with me

Choose how deep
you want to go.

6 weeks

Foundations

$3,200

For when you want to understand your pattern at the root and start changing your responses.

  • Six 55 min 1:1 sessions
  • 6 core subconscious reprogramming tools, yours to keep
  • Session recordings
  • Weekly action steps
  • Monthly group meeting for 3 months
Book a free call

12 weeks · Premium

Most chosen

The Redo Love Method™

$6,000

The full program. Heal childhood wounds, change your attachment style, and trust yourself and your decisions.

  • Twelve 55 min 1:1 sessions
  • 12 tools that reprogram your subconscious for good, yours to keep forever
  • Sessions recorded and annotated so you can get the most out of each one
  • Weekly action steps that help you meet your goals
  • Techniques that calm anxiety and bring you into a flow state in minutes
  • Learn to set and enforce boundaries that bring you closer to what you want
  • Monthly group meeting, free forever
Book a free call

Not sure which one fits? That's what the free call is for. We'll look at where you are and what you want, and I'll tell you honestly if I can help.

Questions

What you might
be wondering.

I've already spent thousands on therapy. Why would this be different?+

Therapy mostly works with the conscious mind, so you end up understanding your pattern really well. We work on the subconscious, where the pattern is coded. Clients who did years of weekly therapy often tell me they changed more in 12 weeks.

I can't really afford it right now.+

I hear you. Think about what you're already spending on therapy, books, courses and apps that haven't moved the needle. As my client Marcel put it, this was the best investment he's ever made in his life. Bring it up on the free call and we'll talk it through.

I don't have time to do the work.+

You're already spending the time. On overthinking, rereading texts, recovering from the last breakup. Sessions are 55 minutes a week, and the action steps fit into your normal life.

Will I have to leave my partner?+

No. Many clients come to me in a relationship and want it to work. Some fix the dynamic with an avoidant partner without having to leave. What changes is that you get to choose from a secure place instead of from fear.

Will you judge me?+

Never. I've rage texted. I've grasped. I've been the woman falling apart over crumbs. Clients say talking to me feels like talking to a friend, or getting advice from a sister. I'm direct, and I'll call you on your stuff, with zero judgement.

Is this just for women?+

No. Most of my clients are women, and I also work with men who've been through a brutal discard or keep repeating the same relationship patterns.

This sounds a bit out there. Does it actually work?+

I was skeptical too. The approach is based on memory reconsolidation, a real process studied in psychology, and the same visualization principle athletes use. The emails from clients on this page are the best answer I can give you.

Your next step

Book your free call.

30 minutes, just you and me. Tell me about the pattern you're tired of living. I'll show you where it's coming from and whether the Redo Love Method™ is right for you.

Book a free call

"I only wish I would have started her plan sooner." Gerry M.